Ten petty, random things that piss me off are:
1) People who can’t zip merge in traffic. You know what? I know it’s not always easy. But zip-merging appears to be something that is entirely absent from the skill set of 92.4% of Japanese drivers. When attempting to merge into another lane of traffic, a disproportionate number of drivers in Japan will either hang back with a sort of tentative patheticness, or rush ahead and then keep pace with you. It boggles the mind. LEARN TO ZIP MERGE, PEOPLE.
2) Multinational, multi-linguistic websites that don’t let you pick your language. (Nike.com, Dell.com, EA Origin – you are all jackasses.) Here’s a novel thought: not everyone who lives in a country speaks the main language of that country. Sure, 99% of the population of Japan speaks Japanese, but there’s 1% that doesn’t. One percent of faithful users who would like to buy your product but are ex-pats, foreigners, on holiday or not ethnically homogeneous. In countries where that proportion is bigger than 1%, the failure of so-called multi-national companies to allow them access to information that has already been translated is frankly, bizarre, and just a little bit racist.
3) The fact that people don’t dance any more. This is such a big thing in Japan. There should be more dancing, more folk-dancing, more chances to just let go with your body. Not club dancing – folk-dancing. Like Greek people do. The world doesn’t need so many plates.
4) When my YouTube video won’t load fast enough.
5) When my YouTube video claims to have loaded, but won’t play. What. The. Fuck?!?
6) Undercuts. Actually, it’s a little hard to say I hate these, because I think they look ermaaaazing on some people. Other people though… just looks like you’re halfway through an appointment with a torturer.
7) Overzealous clothes matching. Women who match their one, solid shade of eyeshadow with their shirt and men who match their socks with their shirt. There’s so much good fashion advice out there. It’s not hard and not expensive.
8) The fact that we don’t have a Babel Fish yet.
9) The fact that I cannot strum a guitar with any kind of rhythm or consistency despite having “played” the guitar for a number of years.
10) The lack of pistachio ice cream in my life. It’s my favourite. Sadface.
WTF Wednesday over and out.